It’s not just 4 letter words that frustrate me and cause nightmares about children with poor grammar and sentence structure (do you know how horrifying a world would be if everything was “cool” or “neat” or “nice”?) It’s the words and phrases that American society has over worked and under appreciated. They are the words and every one says, but no one uses correctly. The words that if used every one in a while are quite acceptable, but when used every other word in every single sentence become mundane, empty, useless, vapid, repetitive, lifeless, bland, stale, lackluster, banal, monochrome, dreary, humdrum, mind-numbing, wearisome, tiring, tiresome, irksome, trying, frustrating, and (to those of us who enjoy the artistry of a full vocabulary) painful. You know what I’m talking about.
Cool, dude, chill, sweet, nice, legit, my bad, like, literally, awesome, ridiculous, gay, nice, whatever, seriously, you know, don’t judge/judge, and countless others.
Are these really the most descriptive words the English language has to offer? I mean… “Come on dude… seriously…. Like big words are gay man, just chill out.”
Ouch. My brain just shuddered.
Cool – This can mean anything from “OH MY GOODNESS I LOVE IT” and “yeah, I’d wear it if someone else bought it for me” to “no way on earth” and “I am so bored my brain is melting”. I have had conversations with people where the only descriptive word used (adj or adv) is “cool”. It leads to some VERY boring and confusing conversations. If everything is “cool” than I don’t know what you really like, or what you sort of like, or what you hate, or what you are afraid to tell me you hate, because it’s all “cool”. Some things are cool. Some are boring. “Cool” is boring.
“So I heard you went indoor sky diving. How was it? Was it amazing? How exciting!”
“Yeah, It was cool”
“So he’s a pretty great guy right? I heard you really like him! So cute!”
“He’s cool.”
“Honey! I bought you an oboe! Now you can start taking lessons aren’t you excited?!”
“Um…. Yeah mom. That’s cool…..”
Dude – Originated from England in the early 1880s, meaning a stuck up person who was foppish. Used synonymously with Macaroni and fool. During western expansion in America it meant a person moved west with no knowledge of what he was getting into. Meant something like city slicker or newbie. First used in print in 1870 in Putnam’s magazine. Today “dude” isn’t an insult, but it really shouldn’t be a compliment either. Dude can be used in a variety of ways from pronoun to adjective.
To start a conversation: “Dude…. What’s going on?”
To fill space in a conversation in place of “like” “um” or “huh” “It was like… Dude…. Amazing”
To signify something’s awesomeness “DUUUUUDE!”
To show something’s lameness “DUUUUUUDE.”
To add significance to a sentence “That burger was amazing man. I mean… like…. Dude… “
(picture taken from Wikipedia page on "dude". 1888 picture of Evander Berry Wall, a New York socialite who was dubbed "King of the Dudes.")
Chill – Adjective or verb used as an admonition to relax one’s countenance or position on a certain subject, use as a compliment when regarding someone’s nature, describing doing a bunch of nothing or sometimes actually doing something but calling it nothing anyway as a way of avoiding conflict.
“YOU ARE A AWFUL TUTOR! YOU ARE TERRIBLE AND HORRIBLE!”
“Wow…. chill out.”
“What are you doing tonight?”
“Just chilling out.”
“Your teacher lets you use your computer in class?”
“Yeah, he’s super chill about that stuff.”
Sweet – Most often used as an adjective meaning satisfaction or approval. It describes something desirable whether it is an event, person, object, or emotion. The longer the double “e” sound the more the satisfaction.
“Jamie is coming to visit”
“SWEEEEEEEEEET”
“Do you like Hannah?”
“Oh course. She’s so sweet”
“We’re having pizza for dinner.”
“SWEEEEETNESS DUDE!”
Lame – According to the online Merriam-Webster Dictionary lame means “having a body part and especially a limb so disabled as to impair freedom of movement b: marked by stiffness and soreness, or 2: lacking needful or desirable substance”. The term “lame duck” means an elected official who is approaching the end of their tenure especially when their replacement has already been elected. Nowadays lame means something along the lines of stupid and “un cool”. Most of the time lame is used in reference to something that is thought to be unattractive or undesirable.
“Hey, want to play a board game?”
“No, board games are lame”
“Honey, will you please put on the sweater your grandmother game you for Christmas?”
“No way Mom! It’s so lame!”
“What do you think about Edward? Nice kid right?”
“Eh, he’s lame.”
Nice – Mostly an adjective used to fill up space in conversation and to avoid awkward pauses. Something you say when you’re describing a someone to a friend and you don’t really have anything particularly nice to say about them. What we say when we don’t think someone will agree with your real opinion. On the rare occasion that it’s used truthfully, it means generically acceptable. Acts as a conversation diffuser.
“I went to the mall today”
“Nice”
“Don’t you just love my new purse?”
“It’s nice”
“I think that my opinions matter most. I have my own opinion! Isn’t that great?!”
“Yeah…. That’s nice….”
Legit – Adjective depicting something that is real and not fake. Stemming from the word legitimate. Can mean “cool” or “nice” or “wicked”. This word is particularly overused. I’ve heard it used to describe a new outfit, a sports play, a relationship, a restaurant, and even a car. Acts as a low-key compliment.
“They are the sweetest couple ever.”
“Yeah, they are so legit.”
“Oh my goodness! My aunt bought me a car!”
“That is so legit man!”
“Did you see that sweet play Papelbon made?”
“Yeah, it was seriously legit.”
My bad – The best definition I’ve heard of this phrase comes from Urban Dictionary
“I did something bad, and I recognize that I did something bad, but there is nothing that can be done for it now, and there is technically no reason to apologize for that error, so let's just assume that I won't do it again, get over it, and move on with our lives."
Got to love Urban Dictionary.com
“What in the world are you doing?! You just deleted my paper! I can’t believe you did that! I am so upset! That took me hours of writing and weeks of research!”
“Woah, my bad.”
Like – Signifies uncertainty on a certain subject, used to give the speaker time to think of a better word, can means “said”, can mean someone likes you, and sometimes used in between every like single like word like in every like single like sentence.
“She was like, No way and I was like, oh yeah….”
“He likes you!”
“I know! It was like, the most like legit, like thing ever. Like, you know?”
Fail – A interjection or verb expressing disapproval or false shame. Best definition I’ve heard is “A glorious lack of success”. Root word of Failure. It’s possible that in our modern world where we can’t every tell anyone they didn’t brilliantly succeed, (since we couldn’t possibly say “YOU HAVE JUST EXPERIENCED FAILURE”) We have resorted to laughing in somewhat encouraging manner and saying “Fail!”
You try and jump onto a floating dock and tragically miss, thus falling into the water…
“Ouch. Haha. YOU FAIL!”
“M-I-S-S-I-P… uh… I”
“FAIL FAIL FAIL”
“He is so nice! I can’t wait to be in his class again.”
“You like that professor? FAIL.”
Whatever – it really means something like this… “ I disagree with your point but I’d rather not argue because I am obviously just so much better than you for my choosing not to argue… or…. I actually think you might win this argument and instead of forfeiting honorably or admitting defeat, I will just bow out like a little kid who runs back home when he gets tagged. Nice.
“Come on, you know I have a point… “
“Whatever”
“I love those shoes your aunt bought you! Don’t you love them?”
“Uh yeah. Whatever”
“What do you want to do today?”
“Whatever. I don’t care.”
You know – This is possible one of the most frustrating phrases. It’s usually used when the person you’re talking to doesn’t actually know what you’re talking about and you have no hope of figuring out what they mean but they want to pretend that everyone is on the same page. Makes perfect sense. You know?
“It was round, and flat, and purple… oh you know!”
“He was just so like… amazing… and not normal… you know?”
“Where is my shirt? You know the one…. It’s black… with the thing… Oh you know.”
Wow. That turned out to be a lot longer than I intended and I even had to delete some words! Ever watch Princess Bride? Remember when Inigo tells Vizzini, "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means?" Most of the words on this list…. are words like that. Words that no one really knows the meaning of, but everyone uses them. Where are the words like vapid, chatoyant, cynosure, demesne, desultory, diaphanous, ineffable, dulcet, effervescent, ephemeral, lissome, evocative, fetching, opulent, seraglio, I could go on. But chances are no one knows what I’m talking about so I will stop. Besides, I’ve been writing for too long.
Use your vocabulary to your greatest potential my friends. Be surreptitious with your words and use a scintilla such as vocabulary to make your speech more mellifluous.
Look it up :-p
you and your vocabulary impress me.
ReplyDeletehave you ever heard of those everyday proverbs "translated" into scintillating verbiage? like..."avion species of analogous plumage, congregate."
on the other hand, winston churchill said that, "broadly speaking, the short words are the best, and the old words best of all."
make of it what you will. :)
"avion species of analogous plumage, congregate."
ReplyDeleteBirds of a feather flock together.
HAHA! I LIKE IT!
oh.... how am I suppose to counter point Good Ole' Chuchill? :-p